Centipede to physician: "Doc, when my feet hurt, I hurt all over."
Centipede to pal: "I just hate it when I start the day off on the wrong foot."
Why do we not raise the silkworm in the U.S.? We get our silk from the rayon. He is a larger animal species and gives more silk.
Each silkworm in a colony bet on a boast, That its silk production would be the most. But none of them won---and the reason why. All the silk they made wound up in a tie. (Or maybe it wound up in a shirt.)
Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.
Joe: Did you ever see a horse fly?
Pete: No, but I once saw a cow jump off a cliff.
Joe: What has four wheels and flies?
Pete: A garbage wagon.
Joe: What is black and red, hairy, with six legs and a long stinger?
Pete: I don't know. What is it?
Joe: I don't know either, but there's one crawling on your back.
Joe: What's the biggest ant?
Pete: My Aunt Bertha.
Joe: No, it's an eleph-ant.
Pete: I guess you've never seen my Aunt Bertha.
The story goes that some students of Charles Darwin glued together parts from several different kinds of insects, and took the composite insect to Darwin for identification. When Darwin looked at the insect, he asked the students if it hummed when it was alive. They said that it did. Darwin said, "Then it must be a humbug."
